Monthly Archives: June 2016

#SLAM4HAM: Annoying Actor Friend’s 2016 Tony Awards Drinking Game

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What an incredible Broadway season, right?! So many Hamilton! Hamilton think pieces! Hamilton jokes! Hamilton memes! Hamilton Hamilton! Since the moment Hamilton opened at the Public on January 20th, 1997, it has just been one awesome and crazy ride to the 70th Annual Tony Awards.

Wow. Has Tony time for Hamilton come already? I mean, thank goodness Jeffrey Seller coaxed Harvey Weinstein into locking down Radio City this month so that the Tonys had to bump a week to the Beacon, thus adding an extra seven days of cultural relevance for the juggernaut. Alas, unfortunately it is finally the moment for the Event of the Century to climb atop the Iron Thrown, and then go gently into that dark night, to make way for future artistic triumphs of the American Theatre such as the revival of Motown.

OK! Grab several of your favorite drinks (pour one out for every member of the original cast of Hamilton who left the production before the Tony Awards) because it’s time to slam a few back for Ham! #Slam4Ham.

THE RULES:

You might remember some of these rules from 2015’s Somedrink Rotten, 2014’s A Drinker’s Guide… and 2013’s Drinky Boots, and I’m not even ashamed to recycle them (or the rest of this sentence) because there were literally nine hundred theatre award ceremonies this year, and I’ve already forgotten which one I’m currently writing about.

As per usual, all rules apply to what is happening on screen, through social media, or wherever you are viewing it.. Unless otherwise specified, drink when:

  • You hear the words: “live theatre”
  • Hamilton wins something (Drink WATER. Remember: Tonight is a marathon, not a sprint. The only way I can assure that all of you will remain hydrated is by instilling this mandatory rule that requires everyone to drink water every six to seven minutes).
  • A winner thanks God in their acceptance speech (take one drink for them, and one for the latest national tragedy that God didn’t get a chance to stop because He was too busy helping that person win a Tony).
  • You roll your eyes.
  • A moment is so awkward, your butthole literally clenches.
  • Someone tweets something and then deletes it.
  • Lin-Manuel raps while not in a costume (Again, drink WATER).
  • Jennifer EFFING Simard.
  • The sound doesn’t work (drink cautiously because it’s going to be a long night).
  • There is a technical issue (again, drink cautiously because it’s going to be a long night and they haven’t been at this venue since Once).
  • Someone says the entire title of Shuffle Along without stumbling (take a shot).
  • CBS celebrity!
  • Who is that CBS celebrity I don’t watch CBS!
  • A producer of an un-nominated show buys air time.
  • Fans of a nominated show are tricked into buying air time.
  • Pies.
  • Someone spells it Tony’s. #unfriend.
  • Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber drags a diva.
  • Someone uses the words #grateful or #blessed in any form. That includes ironically.
  • An award is presented that was left out of last year’s telecast because it wasn’t Hamilton (take one shot for Lisa Kron and two for Jeanine Tesori).
  • Something happens with the plays.
  • Cynthia Erivo does Jack Palance-style one armed pushups when she wins.
  • A kid from School of Rock quits the business midway through their performance because it’s the 27th time they’ve done “You’re in the Band” this week.
  • You see someone you know on stage.
  • You get bitterly jealous of said person.
  • You see someone onstage who doesn’t belong there (drink at your own risk).
  • Streisand appears after 46 years to make us all OK with her doing the new Gypsy movie and Broadway Internet collectively shits itself.
  • Banjos.

#SLAM4HAM: If someone or something beats Hamilton in any category, grab the bottle nearest to you, slam it back until it’s finished, and then run streaking through the streets until daybreak.

Remember to always drink cautiously, but unapologetically.

2016 AWARESIE AWARDS: Winners!

The AWARESIE AWARDS honor excellence on Broadway, Broadway Internet, and more specifically: Sh*t the Tonys Leave Out

IT’S THE 2ND ANNUAL AWARESIE AWARDS!

An ‘awaresie’ is an “intelligent follower of Annoying Actor Friend who is aware of the negative implications of social media masturbation.”

The AWARESIE AWARDS were created to spread awareness of lesser celebrated creative people within the industry, as well as highlight important (and maybe some not-so important) entities that contribute greatly to the community.

All nominees were handpicked by Annoying Actor Friend after a happy hour. Winners were voted on by the Awaresie Academy, which is a group of 60+ industry professionals (actors, writers, producers, media) and complete randos (friends) chosen by Annoying Actor Friend. We can not confirm that the entire Awaresie Academy saw every play or musical on Broadway this season, but Annoying Actor Friend trusts them, so you should trust their opinion. WE AREN’T THE DRAMA DESKS, OUTER CRITICS CIRCLE, ETC.

The 2nd AWARESIE AWARDS were held at an elaborate ceremony on YouTube with appearances from Cameron Adams, Iain Armitage, Laura Benanti, Mo Brady, Andrew Briedis, Craig Burns, Mike Carlsen, Gavin Creel, Max Crumm, Frank DiLella, Tina Fey, Brian Gallagher, Kathryn Gallagher, Michael Gioia, Megan Hilty, Rachel Hoffman, Sarah Marie Jenkins, Nikka Graff Lanzarone, Ashlee Latimer, Zachary Levi, Lesli Margherita, Ellyn Marie Marsh, Chris McCarrell, Chelsea Nachman, Keala Settle, Jeff Richmond, Matthew Rodin, Krysta Rodriguez, Jennifer Ashley Tepper, Roma Torre, Jennifer Simard, and Alex Wyse.

AND THE AWARESIES GO TO…

Best Sound Design of a Play

WINNER! Christopher Cronin, Noises Off

Fitz Patton, The Humans

Tom Gibbons, The Crucible

Broken Chord, Eclipsed

Darron L. West, Fully Committed

Best Sound Design of a Musical

WINNER! Nevin Steinberg, Hamilton

Mick Potter, School of Rock

Scott Lehrer, Shuffle Along

Nevin Steinberg, Bright Star

Gareth Owen, Spring Awakening

Best Casting of a Play

Fool for Love, Calleri Casting, Nancy Piccione (additional)

WINNER! The Humans, Carrie Gardner, C.S.A.

Eclipsed, Jordan Thaler, C.S.A., Heidi Griffiths, C.S.A. and Laura Schutzel, C.S.A.

A View From the Bridge, Julia Horan CDG, Heidi Griffiths, C.S.A.

The Crucible, Bill Berloni for “The Wolf”

Best Casting of a Musical

School of Rock, Tara Rubin Casting

WINNER! Hamilton, Telsey + Company and Bethany Knox, C.S.A.

The Color Purple, Telsey + Company and Justin Huff, C.S.A.

She Loves Me, Jim Carnahan, C.S.A. and Stephen Kopel C.S.A.

Disaster!, Seth Rudetsky’s Phone

Play or Musical that Best Passes the BECHDEL Test

Waitress

Eclipsed

The Humans

Hamilton

WINNER! The Twitter Conversations Between Laura Benanti and Chelsea Nachman

Most Random Concert at 54 Below 

DEX! A Killer Musical: The Unauthorized Parody of DEXTER

Christmas Carols with Chris McCarrell

WINNER! The Melody Lingers On: A “Benefit” for Victims of Earworm

TOO DARN HOT: Hot Pepper Theater LIVE!

Broadway Sings A*Teens

Best at Keeping SMASH Relevant

Debra Messing

Louis Peitzman and Matt Piwowarczyk (After Smash podcast)

Theresa Rebeck’s Book Tour

WINNER! Gay Twitter

Hamilton

Best Performance by Jennifer Simard

WINNER! Jennifer Simard in Disaster! (Sister Mary Downy – Broadway)

Jennifer Simard and Brian d’Arcy James announce the Outer Critics Circle Nominees

Jennifer Simard hosts part of the 30th Annual Easter Bonnet Competition

Jennifer Simard in Sisters (Pet Activist at Party – Universal)

Best Broadway Bound Musical We Know Nothing About

WINNER! Mean Girls – Book by Tina Fey, Music by Jeff Richmond, Lyrics by Nell Benjamin

A League of Their Own – Music and Lyrics by Jason Robert Brown, Book by… Penny Marshall? Maybe? Aaron Sorkin?

Bombshell – Music and Lyrics by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, Book by WHO DA FUCK KNOWS

Hamil2 – East of Broadway Company

Best Performance by an Actor Who Appeared on the Audiobook of #SOBLESSED

Lesli Margherita, Dames at Sea

Megan Hilty, Noises Off

Keala Settle, Waitress

Krysta Rodriguez, Spring Awakening

Andrew Keenan-Bolger, Tuck Everlasting

Will Swenson, That One Week in Disaster!

WINNER! Tituss Burgess, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

Best Performance by a Hashtag

WINNER! #KanyeDescribesAMusical

#NotMyService

#Stand4Ham

#ImWithHer

#FeelTheBern

Best Ensemble in a Musical

WINNER! Hamilton

Bright Star

Fiddler on the Roof

Shuffle Along

Best Use of American Sign Language in a Play or Musical

WINNER! Spring Awakening

Hamilton

Outstanding Performance By A Midtown Hangout That You Actually Love But Hate Going To

WINNER! Glass House Tavern

Schmackary’s

World Wide Plaza

Olive Garden in Times Square

The Elaine Stritch Unemployment Avoidance Award

Aaron Albano

WINNER! Cameron Adams*

James Brown III

Lisa Gajda

Audra McDonald

*runner-up to Lisa Gajda who was disqualified due to unemployment at the time of the 2016 Awaresie Awards ceremony.

Best Performance By Something That Makes You Want to Kill Yourself

WINNER! Daily Hamilton News That Was Not Issued By Their Press Department

Caring About a Viral Equity Movement for Approximately Six Minutes

Broadway Chat Boards

Bitching About Broadway Chat Boards

Everything And Your Mom Being a New York Times Critic’s Pick

Best Lin-Manuel Tweet

WINNER! Luz (@ltmphd)

Outstanding Broadway On Camera Hosting

NY1’s “On Stage” with Roma Torre, Donna Karger, and Frank DiLella

“Playbill’s Red Carpet Challenge” with Matthew Rodin

Broadway Style Guide

WINNER! Lesli Margherita on Anything She Does for Broadway.com

Best Broadway Internet Brand/Organization

Broadway Black

The Interval: Smart Girls’ Guide to Theatricality

WINNER! Justin “Squigs” Robertson

Hamilfans/Faniltons/Hamiltrash

Best Self Created and Produced Internet Thing

Theater People Podcast – podcast – created and hosted by Patrick Hinds/produced by Mike Jenson

Turning the Tables – web series – created by Ellyn Marie Marsh/produced by Katherine Paige

WINNER! The Ensemblist – podcast – created and hosted by Mo Brady & Nikka Graff Lanzarone

#MakingMondays – live broadcast – hosted by Jordan Roth/created by Jordan Roth and Robbie Roth/produced via Periscope and fueled with wine

Best Marketing/Advertising Department for a Play or Musical

Hamilton, SPOTCo Inc.

Hamilton, Tumblr

Hamilton, The Grammys

WINNER! Hamilton, That Cross Town Bus

Best Press Department for a Play or Musical

Hamilton, Sam Rudy Media Relations

Hamilton, Playbill

Hamilton, The New York Times

WINNER! Hamilton, Rich People/Celebrities

Best Musical if Hamilton Didn’t Come Out This Season

(Voting for this award was OPEN TO THE PUBLIC via a Twitter poll on @Actor_Friend’s feed between May 2nd – May 9th, 2016.)

Outstanding Production of a Musical Named Hamilton

Hamilton

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WINNER! Hamilton

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Thérèse Raquin

2016 AWARESIE of the Year

Annoying Actor Friend – “Wow! I can’t believe I won! This is such a surprise! When I created the Awaresie Awards with the sole intention of awarding myself the top prize, I never imagined that dream would actually become a reality. I’m so incredibly humbled. I’d like to thank Twitter, Broadway, my fans, the Awaresie Academy, and most of all, Me, for without whom, none of this would have been possible. Goodnight, and see you all next year.”


Thank you for joining us for the 2nd Annual Awaresie Awards. We look forward to **maybe** doing this again next year!

Some of you might be wondering why a group of somewhat anonymous people with questionable knowledge about the theatre are allowed to choose whom takes home the coveted and respected Awaresie Award, which is why I must point out that despite the lack of expertise among Awaresie voters in assessing elements such as sound design, it is better to potentially celebrate the art incorrectly, than to ignore the art altogether.